I ate too much today. I engaged in some major emotional eating that I shouldn’t have.
Blah.
I spent the night alone at home while Kepa was out with friends and I just got really down about the situation. I had a little pity party featuring multiple snacks that weren’t needed. It was easier for me to deal with overeating (what I’m used to) rather than deal with the actual emotions I was feeling (what I’m not used to). After I finished eating and came to my senses I wrote about it. I wrote down all of my thoughts before and after, emotions, all of it. I decided I wouldn’t post it though it did help me move on from the situation.
I have moved on and I’m focusing on the positive. Things aren’t all bad living here (basically my pity party involved being sad about living here and having no friends… lame). Last time I was living in NZ I had a really hard time adjusting but this time does seem to be better. I have a job, a dog, a lovely husband. And truthfully I’m actually starting to make friends here. Even if I don’t have besties I see every weekend I still have a few people to grab coffee with or go for a walk occasionally. Things are slowly improving and I’m making friends and that’s great. I guess I went temporarily insane and turned to food when I shouldn’t have.
It happens.
It happens much less frequently than it previously did.
Progress, not perfection. Right?
The good things about the day: I finished a killer leg workout in the morning, I ate a salad with grilled chicken for lunch, I drank tons of water, I ate multiple veggie servings, I caught up on Project Runway & Glee, I found a cheap sewing class to take and I made plans for next weekend.
Overall, even with the day ending in being alone and overeating, it was still pretty rad. Moving on because tomorrow is going to be a better day (just like the rest of this week that was pretty awesome!)
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{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }
Oh man, I can totally relate to you and your admit your seeking comfort in food must have taken a lot of bravery, so bravo to you. I was doing sooo good on the whole ‘let’s not emotional eat’ thing, but this week I just went through too much. I graduated last August and I cannot find a job. I have sent out hundreds of applications, only to get 6 interviews total, and I haven’t gotten hired yet. I’m running out of money, and patience. I have gotten so frustrated – I don’t understand how, even with a Masters degree, I can’t get a job. People say my resume is perfect. This week it really got to me because I got so frustrated after all the hard work I’ve put in. It got to the point where I couldn’t handle it – I was severely depressed every day! I needed to find some way to deal with it so I went to food. And let me tell you, I’ve realized that it’s not really helping because on top of everything else, now I feel guilty for setting myself back on my personal goals. Overcoming emotional eating is such a hard thing to do, so yes – congratulations on making progress! It takes a lot of time, and maybe there will never be a ‘cure’ but thinking about it less and less is HUGE! When I’m sad I try to think of my grandma saying ‘this too shall pass,’ and realize that my urges to soothe myself with food will pass, too. Everything gets better with time.
We have all kinds of ups & downs thru this but I am so glad you finished UP! :-) We just have to keep moving forward!
Jody – Fit at 54´s last [type] ..Gratitude Monday & A Healthy Heart; Squirrel Nut Zippers
I have SO been there and I’m sending you a major high five for processing it all. It takes practice to get to where you can head off food as a method of escape at the pass, but you know that. You’re pretty freakin’ amazing and you’ve come a really long way. The great thing is, even though you don’t have folks right there with you to hang out with, there are so many of us “hanging out” with you every day so you’re never really alone.
I am continually inspired by your journey and you help to keep me motivated on mine. Thank you so much for all that you share. :o)
Good for you. Totally understand the emotional overeating, as I frequently find myself there. Inspired by your dedication. Keep on keeping on!
You nailed it on the head – “Progress, not perfection.” I am also an emotional eater, so I can definitely relate. Way to pick yourself up and move on. You’re an inspiration!
Dev´s last [type] ..Up a Pound
Progress not perfection is my all time favorite saying! Good for you for moving on.
I have been there in the pity party and picking up the food because it was comforting and easy to do. But here is the key to make any changes which you are doing is that you are having awareness of the behavior. You are no longer in denial and that you are practicing acceptance which has been key for me when it comes to the food recovery. Yes it is about the progress not perfection. Just remember you are not alone! Lots of love your way xoxo