Generally speaking, jealousy is a bad thing. It ruins relationships, creates self-loathing, and hurts the person that harbors it. There is very little good that comes from most jealousy.
But sometimes you need to be a little jealous to succeed.
Sometimes you need to have role models that you look up to with a bit of jealousy. You need those people (or companies if you are talking business, which we aren’t) to set the bar. You need them to succeed to show you that it is possible to reach certain levels of success. You need them to exist so you can be jealous enough of their success that you reach out and grab your own.
Jealousy can be a positive thing if it spurs you toward action. If your jealousy toward someone spurs you not to hate your current situation but to change it and move closer toward success, then it is a good thing.
And let me tell you a little secret… I am jealous. I am completely and totally jealous.
Who am I jealous of? The successful losers. I’m jealous of Roni, FLG, Diane, Jen, Cammy and other successful weight loss and fitness bloggers. I’m jealous that they are healthier and have lost most if not all of the weight they wanted to lose. They have reached their goals and I’m jealous. I’ve been trying for a while and have managed to land further away from my goals. So I’m jealous of all the people that have already hit their goal.
But my jealousy isn’t negative. It doesn’t make me feel bad about myself or hate these guys. It just makes me want to succeed even more. I want to join their ranks and say that I reached my goal. I want to tell people they can lose weight and live the life they want and show them it is possible through my own life. My jealousy spurs me to action. It drags me to the gym and makes me reach out for help when I struggle. The jealousy is just one of many motives behind my actions but it is there. It is there pushing me on toward success.
Also…
TOMORROW IS MY LAST DAY AT WORK! OMG! AH! HURRAY! OH NO!
I’m super excited. Now all I gotta do is move and find a new job. Can I be jealous of people with jobs? That is very “in” right now, considering the current rate of unemployment in the United States. Still… very exciting!
I don’t think I’ve ever been exactly jealous of those weight loss bloggers that have been successful. I’m more inspired by their stories and happy that they’ve gotten to a place that I’m going to eventually get. I guess I could be jealous that they started their journey before I did…
Interesting post.
Jack Sh*t’s last blog post..And Speaking of Twitter…
bottle up whatever motivation you get from your feelings and run with it lady! Get your butt in gear! You are the only one who can make this happen so don’t hold yourself back :) AND…rely on us in the community. We probably won’t be able to tell you the answers but we are here for you, to help you, to keep you going when you feel like your ready to give up. Cuz now, we know where you blog – no running from us! mwahahahahahaahahaha
Jen, a priorfatgirl’s last blog post..Forever? Forever Ever?
A little healthy jealousy never hurt anyone. Just know that you can do it too. Let me say that again – you CAN do it too! Don’t worry about what happened yesterday, just move forward.
South Beach Steve’s last blog post..Day 360 – A Little Off
@Jen
I <3 u even with your stalkerish comments! LOL. I am definitely relying on community. You guys are all so awesome and helpful!
@Jack
I am definitely inspired by and happy for them. But their is definitely some jealousy there too, in a good way.
Jealousy can be motivating… But don’t let it blind you. Once you get to goal. the real work begins.
Sarah’s last blog post..Not a fan of that Dannon Light & Fit Commercial
As long as the jealousy gets you on track, then I don’t know that it’s jealousy as much as motivation. I wonder if that’s why they say losing weight and working out with a buddy can help you succeed. Whatever works.
All I know is the community of bloggers and Twitter friends I have found this time around have definitely kept me on track and moving forward! I am so thankful for that.
Soon, I think we will all be jealous of you too! You will get there. :)
Diane’s last blog post..Drumroll Please…..
Don’t compare yourself to others. You are unique, and you will get there when you’re ready. Like the proverb says, “when the student is ready the teacher will appear.” But if your jealousy does help motivate you, then it can be helpful (just don’t let it get in the way of your own progress…)
I’m glad you DO reach out for help when you struggle, that is key!
And yes, it is exciting that tomorrow is your last day of work. A time to turn the page, and move on to a new chapter in your life :)
Dinneen – Eat Without Guilt’s last blog post..9 Healthy Tips to Surviving BBQ Season
Whatever works for you.. does not sound like a bad type of jealousy.
How exciting about your move! You go girl! You cam do it! Glad you like the exercises on my post today. Check out tomorrow for a couple more you can do anywhere!
Keep on keeping on!
@Jody
I did! I’m kind of storing those and other workouts in my head for my traveling in the next couple weeks so I can get it done without a gym. Looking forward to tomorrow’s post!
You have a lot of great things going for you. There are plenty of people who are jealous of you!!! Great writing, confidence in leaving a job, lost over 10 pounds! Do not sell yourself short!
I am jealous of that Tony guy, just because he is so damn sexy!
I’m glad to hear you don’t hate me! You are right though – jealousy can be negative or positive, depending on what you do with it. I’m jealous of my neighbor’s fabulous porch, but I don’t hate her for it. Well, not too much anyway!
You can do this too! You’ve got it all in place, just work your plan!
Diane Fit to the Finish’s last blog post..Restaurant Buffets are Fun for Heavy People
@theantijared
Tony you would be jealous of yourself. LOL. Thank you for that comment though, it made my night. :)
@Diane
Of course I don’t hate you! You are awesome!
It is right that jealousy gives you motivation. The thinking is quite right.
HAPPY LAST DAY!!!
Im torn with the post. I hear what people who say DO NOT COMPARE YOURSELF WITH OTHERS are getting at and DO believe that—yet for me the healthy jealousy you describe was a spark which prodded me onward in my journey.
perhaps its the word which people are still getting tripped up on?
if you called it ASPIRING or somesuch wed say GREAT IDEA (especially since those you liked lost and have maintained in such a healthy way).
CANT WAIT to meet you in person,
Miz.
Miz’s last blog post..First Person Friday (giveaway post).
Excellent post. I think jealousy can definitely be a good motivator. Jealousy is not all knives and daggers.
wildfluffysheep’s last blog post..life with out the scale
I like to be jealous of people in a fun, lighthearted sort of way, like “OMG, I so jealous of Mary’s determination and spirit. She makes me…….smile” hehehe
Yum Yucky’s last blog post..Stupid Diet Tip #429
WOOHOOOOO last day!!!
Any closer to deciding on where to move.. the Raleigh area is booming!
Christina’s last blog post..TGIF!!!!
How is you last day going? I’m excited for you!
Hanlie’s last blog post..Why I don’t mind the word “fat”
@YumYucky
Sis, I love you!
@Christina
I am going to Oregon. Minneapolis is my current backup. I’ll keep Raleigh in mind if neither work out. Haha.
@Hanlie
It was a great day! :)
Channel your inner warrior — you can do this! We all want you to succeed and are here to help you every step of the way! You can do this! Forget feeling jealousy, just feel inspired and know that you can have whatever you want in life — just go after it and be prepared to sweat!
<3 to ya
Annabel’s last blog post..Testing 1, 2, 3
I agree in that we shouldn’t compare ourselves to others, but I’m not sure that’s what you’re doing anyway. I totally understand the jealousy (or is it envy?) and I also KNOW that since you’ve identified it, you can use it to fuel your desire to stick with it.
Also, as I told someone the other day, progress isn’t just measured on the scale or in inches. Everything you’re going through now, those of us who are in the maintenance phase went through also. It IS progress and it will help you down the road. I promise. :)
Cammy@TippyToeDiet’s last blog post..Weekend Wrap-up
Jealousy is one source of motivation. It could really give you a big help on losing weight and able to get shape in no time.
mark’s last blog post..“Gone Too Soon” – Michael Jackson (1958-2009)