Let’s just get right to it, shall we?
Weight: 242.2
Previous Weight: 241.8
Weight Loss This Week: +.4
Weight Loss Total: -9.6
Grr. I’m not all that surprised considering what I’ve eaten the last couple days and my lack of quality workouts. It’s not surprising, but once again I would like to state it is annoying. It is annoying to work several days to lose one pound then gain 2-3 in the matter of a couple bad meals. I HATE that. I totally thought I would be down this week and then I let the sugar, booze, boredom eating begin. (Please don’t leave nice comments about how it is just a fluctuaion. I appreciate them, but it’s not. I was down a couple days ago so this is a gaaaaaaiiin. )
I want to start walking before I go in to the craptastic job. I think it will help improve my mood while I am there so I can be my normal self instead of dreading those hours. The problem with this is I need to wake up an hour earlier. I don’t want to wake up an hour earlier. I like my sleep and therefore hit the snooze button or change the alarm to let me sleep to the last minute.
This happens to be my problem for EVERYTHING. I know what works but I won’t do it unless I get someone other than myself to force me to. I know what I need to eat, what I need to do, etc., but if there is some kind of obstacle in my way I won’t rise to defeat it. I will immediately claim failure due to difficulty. But if I get someone to tell me what to do (even though I already know what to do) I will do it.
For instance, I know that waking up an hour early and going for a walk will make me happy and help me achieve my goals. However the obstacles of lost sleep and laziness are in my way. Will I defeat them and go for a walk? No. I tried this morning and slept in. Would I have gotten up if someone had called me and told me to go walk? Yes. When other people are watching me or telling me what to do I do better. That is probably why I blog, although if you’ve been around for a while you’ve not seen much success even with all the added scrutiny from readers.
Right now my facebook status reads, “Mary has stopped caring at all about what other people think.” In some ways that is true. However, it feels like a huge lie. I still care about what people think. I want them to like me and think I’ve done cool things more than ever. I want to lose weight so people will think I’ve done a good job. (I want to lose weight so I think I’ve done a good job.)
I feel ever more like a failure because I can’t defeat obstacles on my own. I feel like a mess because I can’t control my own mind sometimes. The habits I long ago developed with food and laziness are always right there waiting to jump in at my weakest moments. And when that happens I do care about what other people think because I still don’t want people to think badly of me.
So I’ve fallen to a couple obstacles this week and had a slight weight setback. It took me two freaking months to lose 10 pounds and now I’ve dipped back under that marker. Oh well. Next week will be a better week… as long as I get rid of the cake at home and figure out a way to beat the lazy/sleep obstacle. I just looove sleep so much, ya know? I’ll let you know how it goes!! :-)
TRUST me I completely understand.. After being somewhat lazy on vacation (definitely needed) I had planned to get up early and take the pup for a walk before work.. Insert issue #1 – I had yesterday off so I’m working 4/10 hour days which means I’m already up at 5:15 AM and wasn’t getting up at 4 something. Issue #2 – we had HORRIBLE rains here this morning (1-2 inches within two hours) and when I heard that I rolled back over, hit snooze and went back to bed. I too love sleep but it helps having an active pup who has me up early every day. As far as the obstacles, we all have them and we’ve all stumbled on them – just get yourself up, dust yourself off and start again. Hold your chin up high and feel good about what you’ve accomplished thus far.. If you need help or need to vent don’t hesitate to drop me an e-mail.
Christina
Christina’s last blog post..Vacation blues.. and 10/$10 Hummus
I feel the same way. When I don’t have an instructor or gym buddy telling me to lift weights, I just don’t bother.
If I lived near you, I would totally go for walks with you!! How far away is your work? Any way that you could get yourself to walk to work each day?
Also if you want to share your story on my blog and do some brainstorming with everyone about how to get on track just send me an email :)
Sagan’s last blog post..Guest Post: Avoid Eye Diseases by Eating Right
ok
you knew I was going to say it but Im all for the early awakening.
Im not a fan really and NEVER THOUGHT ID SAY THIS but doing it makes me so much a better ME all day long.
Forget the health benefits—-Im waaay more calm and patient and HAPPY when I get up and move before my day “has” to get moving.
Lemmie know how I could help motivate you.
it took me about a month to really get into it and now I dont set an alarm—Im just UP.
Miz’s last blog post..Living not blogging: YOGA (giveaway post)
@Christina
Thanks Girl. Your comment made me smile. Dust has been knocked off and I’m doing well today.
@Sagan
I wish I lived close enough to work to walk or bike. I would do that in a second! But unfortunately its a 20 minute drive to my workplace. :( So there is no chance of that.
And I am e-mailing you! Just be aware that me saying I’m e-mailing you means it might be a day or two. I rock at twitter but suck at e-mail. I definitely want to get some help from everyone in Sagan blogland.
@Miz
Haha, we know you are early riser. I want to be but can’t seem to wake up any earlier than I absolutely have to for work. I did for a while when my friend wanted to run/walk before work, but when she stopped I stopped. Even if I go to sleep wanting to wake up early when the morning comes I hit snooze. I need someone calling me and telling me to get my lazy butt out of bed! Maybe after a while of doing it I will be like you and just wake up on my own.
I find it difficult to do early mornings and have only just discovered this nifty trick: Put your alarm clock on the other side of your bedroom and turn it up incredibly LOUD! Once you are out of bed (and have stopped swearing under your befuddled breath), you are well and truly UP!
Good luck!
Fat[free]Me’s last blog post..No Rest for the Wicked
I am a night owl and even when I’m at work in the mornings, im not truly awake, and that’s after a shower, and bus, and walk to work. I’m often late to work and people say well just get up earlier, but its seriously not an option. And think of those cool looking early morning yoga classes I could take, ive wanted to try yoga. But some people need our sleep. And I know youre trying to lose weight, I read that getting a full, good night’s sleep increases weight loss. And it certainly improves your brain function. So even if you can’t get up early, think of it as a plus.
Mary, I order you to get up early and exercise! Is that forceful enough for you?
Seriously, it’s only rough in the beginning, but after a while it becomes a habit. And overcoming a little initial discomfort only builds character. You may have stopped caring about what other people think, but you will never stop caring what you think. And I know you know you can do what it takes…
Hanlie’s last blog post..Why I Cook
Hanlie beat me to it! Mary – you have no excuse now. When I read your blog post tomorrow I EXPECT to see that you got up an hour early and exercised. You asked for it, and now you got it: a whole blogosphere that is going to check back in tomorrow and see how you did.
Keep in mind that I am a night owl by nature. Left to my own accord I would stay up until 2-3 AM, then head to bed. I would then get up about 9 or 9:30. Unfortunately, that doesn’t fit with my life. If I am going to exercise, there is only one time of day that works for me — 4:45 AM. Let me tell you what, it is not easy to start that program, but after a week or two your body begins to adjust. I know that first couple of weeks are hard, but you can do it. You just gotta start.
South Beach Steve’s last blog post..Day 244 – Raindrops Keep Falling . . .
It really boils down to which you want most–the sleep or the exercise. Only you can figure that out. But you can probably imagine how STRONG you would feel all day knowing you had your exercise out of the way.
I’ll be happy to call and nag if you think it would help. I’ll be up anyway. :)
Cammy@TippyToeDiet’s last blog post..Cammy Has a Crush…or Two (a giveaway post)
some friends are doing a “biggest loser” type of challenge at work – we’re doing a 1-month challenge and each throwing in $50, then whoever loses the most percentage wins the pot. I’m 5′, 6 1/2″ and about 138 lbs. More than pounds lost I’d just like to tone up, but I’d love to lose 10 lbs (as everyone always does right?). Anyways, any advice on how I can become “the biggest loser”? Sorry, pills and crash diets are out for me, I’m looking for a realistic change that I can put in my lifestyle.
Thanks!
I love sleep too. Too much. However for some strange reason I can’t sleep past 9am. I don’t have a job or anything so I don’t need to be up any earlier. But man, I’d love a lie in once in a while.
I know what you mean about the gain. It took me what seemed like for ever to lose my two stone (like four months) then I gained like 11 pounds in two weeks. two frickin’ weeks. WHY DO WE GAIN QUICKER? grrr.
wildfluffysheep’s last blog post..my fat and my friends.
I have the sleep problem as well! I tried for so long to get up early and walk before I started my day, but in the end it just started to get me down that I couldn’t do it. Now I’ve accepted it’ll never happen, and found a new solution – I don’t use the car at all any more, I walk everywhere I used to drive. It takes a bit longer, but it’s good exercise. I’ve found that forcing myself to do something that is unnatural to me is a good way to set myself up for failure, so I now try to find solutions that work for me.
Kevin
lollujo’s last blog post..Weigh In Week 6
@Cammy
Today I wanted the exercise more, but that might not always be the case. I’ll e-mail you about being my phone nag. :)
@lollujo
In my opinion walking everywhere is better than getting up early to exercise then driving around all day. You are doing the right thing by incorporating exercise naturally instead of trying to rearrange your schedule and change your life completely for it. That never works and people always go back to their original habits.
It took me a couple of weeks to get into the habit of getting up early and going for my walk. But now I’m getting used to it and I look forward to being outside and looking at the mountains.
I’ve also started using the song The Climb by Miley Cyrus as my inspiration and I think about that song when I wake up! Gets me right out of bed.
Good Luck!
Connie @ Fat2HotMommy’s last blog post..Week 12…Fat Chick Walking