(Thank you for reading, as I remind myself of the things I need to know.)
I’ve been having trouble sorting through my emotions the last couple of days, which as an emotional eater, is a tough spot to be in. Sometimes I will catch myself thinking “a little bit of sweetness will make all the problems disappear.” I KNOW it won’t, but the thinking is so deeply ingrained that I still want to turn to food for comfort when I don’t know what else to do.
But eating won’t make me feel better. It won’t make me feel more appreciated. It won’t make the anxiety about the future go away. It won’t erase the sadness that comes from losing new friends so soon after you make them. It won’t make me feel like a better person or a happier one. It won’t clear away confusion and doubt and fear.
Food won’t help.
Food isn’t a bandaid for emotional problems or stress. It’s not a solution to problems. It isn’t a solution for anything, really. It’s just something that keeps our bodies alive. We can enjoy it, take pleasure in it, appreciate it, but in the end it is nothing more than fuel for our bodies.
It’s easier to know that food isn’t the right solution than to put that thought into practice. It’s much easier to give up and let food comfort me for a little while when I feel like a failure. It’s much easier to forget my long term goals for a few moments of happiness with some food. But in the long run?
Food won’t help.
I just have to let myself feel what I’m feeling. It sucks sometimes, and I hate it, but it’s just how it goes. It’s better to cry or fight or think nothing than to turn to food. Because that coping mechanism just creates more problems.
Never has stuffing my face to escape or forget my cares ever resulted in something good. Never. Not once. Yet for some reason my mind thinks that something that has never shown positive results is the answer. Funny how our brains can get stuck in a destructive pattern or habit. It’s hard to let go of things you do for years, even if those things hurt you.
I just have to suck it up and realize everyone feels under appreciated sometimes. Everyone feels forgotten or lonely. Everyone has days where they wake up and have no idea what they are doing or worse WHY they are doing it. Everyone has these emotions at some point.
It’s not fun, but you know what?
Food won’t help.
((So I’m taking these thoughts with me to ruminate over the weekend. Monday is my final assessment here at Green Mountain, so I’ll post my results then. Have a good weekend!))
This is a great post. I am an emotional eater, too. I have to find things to do with myself to get myself to stop…like, I don’t know…stand up to my emotions and get to the root of the problem….which is easier said than done. ;-)
For me, blogging helps, twittering helps, reading, walking, talking…anything to help me deal with the issue and step away from the kitchen.
So real Mary!!! A great post! And yes, turning to food is a short term fix that may lead to one being just more upset later for doing that & then the cycle begins for many people & they can’t get off the roller coaster.
I am really glad you are able to talk thru this & if this is you today, I hope you are feel better soon! I applaud you for not turning to food! You have come far!!!
.-= Jody – Fit at 52´s last blog ..What Teeth & Gums Say about Your Health; Dental Update =-.
As you pack up to leave Green Mountain, be sure to pack your new attitude, new commitment and new moose doll.
Keep up the great work.
.-= Jack Sh*t´s last blog ..Product Review: Nutra-Trim Gum =-.
I know food won’t help! :( I so am the emotional eater as well and am always reminding myself of that!
You are doing a fantastic job…you will continue to do so.
.-= Trish @imaSucceeding´s last blog ..It Was A Great Day =-.
I agree 100% – it’s so easy to smother emotions with food rather than working through the things that are making you feel awful. I’ve been emotional eating since I can remember (been fighting my weight too.. go figure)
you are breaking the cycle though – posting this only compounds the lesson!
Good luck with your assessment and have a great weekend. ;)
.-= Annie´s last blog ..Its the eye of the tiger…. =-.
I know exactly what you mean. I know those feelings all too well. It’s so hard to overcome those feelings. If you figure out the antidote please share!
.-= MackAttack´s last blog ..Fat Buster 5k =-.
Finally Jack has a great comment, you do have a new attitude, and I can see it so much better than anyone. You are going to do fine, you have always been strong, it is just in you, but you have a hard time believing in it, and yourself. I believe in you and I know you have strong faith and strong values, which is what will bring you through anything. I can not change the past for you anymore than I can for myself, but forget the past, wipe it out, look only to now and the future, believe in my Mary, the one you truly are and the one you will always be! You have helped so many people with your writings and you can continue to do so, I can’t imagine just how much you really are appreciated, it gives me such a feeling of pride to know you are my daughter.
Love MOM
This is a great post, and a great reminder. It’s so hard to know this deep down in my soul, when I’ve been programmed all my life to turn to food. But you’re right, the food won’t help.
.-= Janet´s last blog ..Sharing Some Easy Yum Yum =-.
My issue was usually NOT eating when I got upset, which I’ve gotten a lot better at, but I can absolutely identify with this blog for other things. I think I read on twitter youre feeling better, so I’m glad. Maybe blogging helped.
.-= merri´s last blog ..Thanksgiving 2009 =-.
What a great post Mary! So insightful, and a great reminder to all of us emotional eaters. I think ‘Food Won’t Help’ is going to be my new mantra!
Mantra’s are good but also when you make a good choice it gives you power for the next good choice. Your head said to that sugar – I’ve made it through this moment before. And won.
Good for you. Your post was beautiful. I’m going to read it every day. It had a poetic or song-like quality to it.
I’m a stress and emotional eater also. I have it under control 90% of the time, but that other 10% is still up for grabs. I have been listening to a hypnosis CD as I fall asleep. I think its helping.
The CD comes with the book: I Can Make You Thin. Get it at any bookstore or online.
.-= Dr. Kal´s last blog ..Free Weight Loss Plan =-.
Hi Mary,
This is an excellent thing to realize. unlike alcoholics and drug addicts, we can’t avoid all food. We have to eat…it’s like telling an alcoholic to drink responsibly.
It’s a hard row to hoe. You have the right mindset and the right tools.
It sounds like you are ready to return to reality to me.
Thank you for all your kind comments lately. The support I get from my blog helps keep me on track.
.-= chris´s last blog ..December 1rst…countdown to the new year. =-.
“Food won’t help” is a great mantra.
I hope you’re not having those emotions today (lonliness, fear, confusion) but if you are, I hope you’re comforted by your own words here.
.-= Josie´s last blog ..My Thanksgiving =-.
I really like your blog and i respect your work. I’ll be a frequent visitor.
oh missus. i totally needed to hear this post right now. infact i cant even begin to describe how much. seriously. a lot of your posts hit me straight in the heart. thanks mary!
Thank you for a very informative blog. I followed a 7 day plan I found on the web and had fantastic results. I now use it as and when just to maintain my goal weight. I find everyone is different. What works for one person may not work for someone else.
Final assessment? Time flies!
This post is spot on. I have the same issues and the same difficulty with dealing with them. But you’re right: food won’t help.
.-= Sagan´s last blog ..Living Healthy in the Real World: Makeover Edition =-.
You are right on with your train of thought! Food isn’t a feeling. I have to remind myself of that very same fact all the time.
powerful amazing words.
I wish I could recall the name of the KEATS poem which says, to paraphrase, that until we squash and feel sorrow like a grape in the roof of our mouths we can not get through it or past it. WE NEED TO FEEL IT FULLY.
that poem changed my life.
it triggered me to realize that I had to feel all emotions fully and entirely no matter how hard—–or Id merely spend hours/days/multitude of calories distracting myself only to end up feeling them eventually anyway.
.-= Miz´s last blog ..Diabetes: a personal post. =-.
I think you and I write strangely coinciding blog posts at the same time… I swear this has happened before! I totally feel you on this … ” I just have to let myself feel what I’m feeling. It sucks sometimes, and I hate it, but it’s just how it goes.” I’ve had the exact same thoughts, a lot, recently, and I’m not sure why it’s so difficult just accepting where we are, exactly as is. But, it sounds like that’s just what we both need to do. The good, bad, and the ugly…. Your words and courage give me strength, as always. So thank you. And I love your disclaimer “(Thank you for reading, as I remind myself of the things I need to know.)”… that’s exactly why I write too!!
:)
Karen
Me too.
So true. GREAT post.
Very well written post! I don’t think your alone in regards to letting emotions get the best of you. I am also an emotional eater and fight the temptations of eating bad everyday.
The good news is, you have acknowledged your fears and pains and that will position you for success. You are doing great and you are a excellent example of how inner strength always wins the battle! :)
I, too, emotionally eat and need to learn to feel instead of trying to be numb through food. During my crazy days, I subconsciously rationalize that ONE of my senses should be having a good time. When what I’m hearing, seeing, smelling, or physically touching/doing is unpleasant, at least my tasting sense could be pleasurable. Yet, it’s so destructive.
Thanks for sharing your heart. There are so many of us that appreciate it and need to hear it.
Iknow you didn’t write this with me in mind but I want to say thank you anyway. Your words hit right where they needed to. Everyone is under a lot of stress and its east to turn to what we feel most comfortable doing.
Thank you! Thank you!
We are taught at such a young age that food will help. Working so hard not to set that bad example for my kids.
.-= Fit Mommy´s last blog ..Ok…..It’s On! =-.
Totally loved the list!!! Such Awesome suggestions!!! I think I own 1 of everything (even a GoWearFit) except ANYTHING that dealt with cooking….Im not there….YET!!! ;-) I love that you have suggestions for ALL budgets!!! BTW…I TOO Love my Pedometer!!!
Love Ya Lots
Dr. Mo
THANK YOU!