The other night I almost gave up on this whole thing. After I ate pizza and felt horrible physically then saw the number on the scale go up I was ready to throw in the towel.
All I could think about was the fact that I’ve been on this journey for almost seven years. And I’m still not at my goal.
If that’s not enough to make you want to give up, nothing is.
I kept thinking, almost seven years and I still am not at my goal weight, I still haven’t achieved all my fitness goals, I’m still struggling to find the best way to eat, I still am not finished. Almost seven years and I’m still not finished. All I could think was that I’m tired of this.
I really, really wanted to give up. I wanted to stop thinking about it. I wanted to stop writing this blog. I wanted to abandon the quest and just fade into the background living a not-healthy less-than-awesome life where at least no one would care what I did.
It was the first time I’ve ever really thought about giving up for good. Clearly I didn’t let that part of me win since I’m here another day, checking in and following the path to healthiness. I didn’t let that happen because I thought about what I have done in the past several years.
In those years I’ve traveled the world, I’ve lost 40 lbs and maintained it easily, I’ve tried new sports and activities, I’ve completed a triathlon, I’ve learned to love and accept my body, I’ve kept living and kept striving for the best health possible. I’ve done a lot since I started. I’m in no way even close to the person I was when I started.
Being in the blogging weight loss world I’ve seen a lot of people give up. People come and go and sometimes show back up a few months or years later explaining how they gave up for a while. I don’t do that. I keep going and keep updating even if I’m just maintain my progress. I admit that sometimes I’ve been jealous of the people who just quit because staying but not finishing is a million times more embarrassing than if I was to just fade away. Yet I’ve created this little space on the internet that keeps me going, even if I feel like giving up.
Two days after all this inner turmoil I feel great. Seriously, I feel awesome. I’m not even sure what to attribute this awesome feeling to but I love it. Apparently the best days always come after the worst.
Have you ever felt like giving up losing weight or being healthy? What keeps you going?