Sometimes when I think about weight loss and all the effort it takes I feel really shallow and worthless. I spend so much money and time working with my body to make it healthy. I am working on trying to make it healthy again after I made it unhealthy and I continually have to stop myself from doing the things that made me unhealthy in the first place. It is a never ending battle that seems quite stupid when I think about how the rest of the world works.
When I was growing up my parents always wanted me to finish my food because “Poor kids in Africa wouldn’t waste food!” I suspect they really just wanted to get their money’s worth out of the food as well as prevent our dogs from eating table scraps. We didn’t have a ton of money ourselves, but my mom always suckered me into it with mention of the poor starving children. I dutifully ate my food at each meal because I felt too sad to waste anything those poor third world children would want.
Even today I occasionally think about starving children in third world countries when I eat. And I still feel the guilt I felt as a child, just in a different way. Now I feel guilty for being fat, for having too much to eat, for always struggling not to eat when those hungry children in faraway lands have no choice but to not eat. I feel guilty for gorging myself, or at least having the ability to do so since I avoid that these days, when they go to bed hungry every night. I feel guilty that my struggles are of my own creation when they have no control over their situation.
It literally breaks my heart and brings tears to my eyes when I think about how pathetic and shallow my struggles are compared to the life and death struggles of the rest of the world. What a pampered baby I am. What big, sad, food loving babies we all are. How sad is it that I spend the majority of my day thinking about how not to eat something when children in other countries, and even in our own, spend their day praying for something to eat at dinner? How tragic it is that we can’t be healthy when we have the best food, best medical care, best of everything in the world?
If you’ve read this far you might be wondering what the result of these shallow feelings could possibly be. Well, I want to do something instead of just acknowledge and move on from these feelings, so I’m going to scrape my money together and donate it to The Mid South Food Bank, a member organization of Feeding America. I’ve volunteered there before and learned that there are a lot of people that go hungry even in my own community.
I want you help me give. Leave me a comment. For every comment I will donate 10 cents (or more depending on how the number of comments) to The Mid South Food Bank. Its been done before on blogs and I think its a great idea, especially when I’m feeling so entirely focused on myself and my own problems. So leave a comment and give my money to feed someone who needs it more than I do. I’ll keep comments open for a week and at the end of the week will check the number of comments and donate the money.
EDIT: If you would like to match the total and donate to your own local food bank that would be FANTASTIC! Just let me know in the comments that you are in and I will make sure you get the total amount donated next week. : )
Doesn’t it just drive you nuts that we put ourselves through the same struggle over and over again. Why can’t something just “click” and make us have a perfect journey towards becoming the best people we can be. I get so angry with myself sometimes for going down the same road over and over again, only taking away a tiny piece of knowledge each time. I guess the only thing we can do is just keep on truckin!
What a great post!
I can so relate to the constant reminder not to waste food because there are starving children in Africa. I heard it every day growing up from my mom. It has taken me a long time to realize that I won’t help these kids by eating all the food on my plate!
Thanks for the reminder not to be so self-absorbed. We all are. But a reminder once in a while really helps to put things in perspective… :) And how great that you’ll support a food bank in your community.
Have a great weekend! :)
You hit the nail on the head with the shallowness of it all – I too feel the guilt and from the start I wanted to do something to redress the balance. What I do now is donate to a local charity one £1 (I am in the UK) for every 1 lb I lose. It has proven quite a good incentive!
Good luck with your aims – you will be surprised by the response, I am sure!
We always heard about the starving kids in Ethiopia…
The solution is not to finish your plate, but to buy and make less food. An astounding amount of food is wasted each day. That is just criminal.
Of course the best way to help the starving masses is to eat less or no meat. More than half the agricultural acreage in the USA is used to produce feed for livestock. For every sixteen pounds of grain fed to livestock we get one pound of meat. You can feed a whole lot of kids on 16 pounds of grains, but instead 40 000 children starve to death on this planet every day.
In other terms – a given acreage can feed twenty times as many people eating a pure vegetarian diet-style as it could people eating the standard American diet-style.
You have such a huge heart! I love the way you are looking to give! Great idea!
So proud of you. Great job. This is a great idea and I am sure planted a seed in many peoples head including my own about how we can help. I think it’s great idea I will look into it myself.
You have motivated me to be happy with the food that is in my refrigerator and to do the same thing! we do get so into our own lives that we forgot others are having such problems that don’t even compare to ours.
This is a great idea and I think about this subject myself a lot. I try to remind myself despite how I feel most of the time how lucky I am.
@Fat[free]Me
That is such a good idea!! I’ve heard of people saving a dollar or whatever to buy something for themselves, but I LOVE the idea of donating it to a charity.
@Hanlie
You’ve given me a lot to think about. I’m a big fan of meat, well, chicken and turkey, but even this is something I could give up for a day. Will definitely look into and think about this more. I’m definitely not a fan of a pure vegetarian diet – I don’t think we are made to be vegetarians – but we could definitely cut back on the meat consumption.
Cha-ching – here’s to another 10 cents!
Good for you! Here’s my 0.10$ worth! :) You’ve also inspired me to start thinking a bit more about what I buy / eat. Since I started trying to lose weight, I’ve been very much like, “Whatever healthy food I want, I can buy! It inspires me to keep going and makes it less tempting to buy junk!” But the result is I end up buying tooooo much stuff and not eating it! So stupid and wasteful.
Good for you! I think it’s so good to be giving and generous. My second daughter has a heart for the unprivledged all over the world. Thanks for the reminder on not being wasteful with our food, and at the same time appreciating what we have.
Love the idea. Will you please let us know what the grand total is? I’d like to match it with a donation to my area food bank.
Also – a few days ago I had mentioned to you in an email that I thought the C25K program was “tedious” (the whole “watching my watch” thing) But you got me thinking that there MUST be an iPhone app. So I looked, found one and downloaded it. I’m jumping in a week 4 – since I’ve already been running, but I wanted to say thanks for the inspiration!!
GO YOU.
This is such a lovely idea.
I am so with you in remembering the days of “clean the plate”. I think this is a great cause!!! Good for you! Those guilty feelings are turning into good! Funny thing is that I just finished my Sunday post which is about guilt of all things! We all have it, don’t we!!!
Can we comment more than once to help the cause?? Don’t want to “break you” as I know you are trying to save… :-)
i think everyones parents said that. mine did. as a result, ethiopia was one of the first other countries i heard of existing besides the US as a kid.
you’re definitely right. other people would love our lives even when we are grumbling :(
@Allison
That is a great idea! I will edit the post for people who want to match and then post the total next week. :) I LOVE that!
And I am using an iphone app. It just makes a noise when you have to make the switch which is way better than me looking at the clock and couting down the seconds. I am probably repeating week 2 next weeks because I had so much trouble getting my workouts in. But I’m excited. Go us!
@Jodi
Hey Jodi!! Definitely comment multiple times. Ten cents isn’t much and I am doing this because I am able. I saved for BlogHer and then didn’t spend nearly as much as I thought. So my extra funds should go to a good place, I think. I’m totally all for having conversations and such in the comments if it leads to more! And go tell people to comment, hehe. I will count every comment (within reason, no spelling out words or such) toward it! :)
Comment #2!!! I am going to mention this on my blog Monday! I have the weekend ones ready to go BUT I tend to get lazy on the weekend since less readership. :-) I rather mention it Monday when the readership increases!!!
@Jody
Awesome! I’m even more excited now that there are others who will be donating to their local food bank! I understand the lazy non-involvement on weekends. The interenet is dead on the weekends it seems. Which is fine by me because I’ve got plenty to do in the real world! But yeah, send peeps this way on Monday!
Just giving my (your) ten cents. :)
And I’m in to match. Let me know.
I guess I kinda got lucky with that part. If I wasted food, then my parents would say something, but when I was full, they were OK with me only eating until I’m full. And I couldn’t think of anything better to spend your money on than your health as far as buying things for yourself. It’s an investment in your health and your future.
how inspired! It is awesome to donate at a time like this too, my dad runs a homeless shelter and laments how everyone wants to donate at the holidays but the months between are pretty bare. You have inspired me to think of a similar challenge for myself!
@Art
Yeeeeeeeaaaahhh BOY! :) Another matching donation! This is awesome.
@MackAttack
Yeah I know how that goes. Everyone donates around Thanksgiving and Christmas, which is great, but that totally hurts during the summer. So this is a great time to do it. Hope you think up a challenge for yourself! You could always jump on this one and donate to your local food bank. :)
another 10 cents here :D
really interesting to read about why you would clear your plate. my gran would say something similar. she said it was rude to leave food on your plate. your host would think you didnt like their food… so don’t be ungrateful, clear that plate. so i always have until now. some times enough is enough.
That’s a great idea. How good to turn your guilt into something positive! Last year I did a sponsored slim for the Royal Marsden Cancer Hospital, where I’d had some of my own treatment. Everyone knows someone who’s had cancer, so people were amazingly generous, and I raised a lot. And there was the added bonus of losing the 21 pounds (temporarily at least!). So if you still feel guilty despite this lovely idea, there’s another suggestion for you….
LOVE IT!!! I just blogged, but I’ll definitely link you in my next post. What a GREAT idea!!!
You are a blessing to the World and yourself. Don’t ever forget that.
SMILE On!
ML
http://www.MissLori.TV
@Liz
That is a lovely idea. I love the women that do those 3 day walks to raise money for breast cancer. I might do something like that one of these days.
@Amy
Thanks!
@Miss Lori
Aww, you are a sweetie. I’m so glad I met you at BlogHer!
Thanks for the reminder about the Mid South Food Bank, Mary. They do great work and are certainly having to do more with less these days. I’m gonna head over to their site and make my own donation. Thanks for the nudge…
@Jack
Aww, thanks! That is awesome. They definitely have trouble during this time of year so that will be awesome!
Great post! I couldn’t agree more! We sponsor a child every month and it does make me feel better… and I know we’re helping one of those starving children we think of when we don’t finish our dinner. ;)
You’re on, Mary. I’ll match your contribution.
As far as your feelings about yourself, remember that we are all products of our culture so don’t be too hard on yourself. You’re working to change it, and that’s what counts.
You are NOT shallow for struggling with food issues! You are doing this honestly and with great integrity. Yes, we are blessed to have plenty of food here in our neck of the woods but just the fact that you’re aware of the plight of others makes you good! Worthy! Kind! We struggle with the problems we’re given. For some it’s how to get food, any food on the table. For others it’s how to value our selves enough to take care of ourselves inside and out so we can HELP THOSE who need us! As we work through our food issues we’re getting stronger so we can make a difference in the world. You’re grateful for what you have, the abundance we have, and that’s laudable. If we get well….and we can get well…we can work on the world’s troubles. But first, let’s take care of our own. Then we’ll have the blueprint for changing every thing else. :-)
A successful blog needs unique, useful content that interests the readers
It is nice idea of 10 cents for every comment. That time you was a child and had not knew about the starving of other children so why are you worried now?
Well, I think doing something to help folks who need help! On the other hand, I think you are being way too hard on yourself! Don’t add to your struggle by piling on guilt. You obviously have a huge heart and your blog is an inspiration.
Yikes, need to edit the above. Should say: “Well I think doing something to help folks who need it is wonderful!”
I coul d hijack you post with my thoughts about how NOT SHALLOW YOU ARE.
with how amazing you are for always thinking about others.
I shall, however, simple nag you :)
via twitter
to take care of YOU as well.
I added your blog to bookmarks. And i’ll read your articles more often!
@Kim
Thanks Kim. I’m not sitting around beating myself up or anything, but occasionally I do feel really shallow and slightly guilty about where my *focus* is. That will probably be my next blog post.
@Miz
Hey, thanks. You are my favorite twitnag after all. :)
Best article, lots of intersting things to digest. Very informative
Commenting…one more time. :)
What a great idea. I’m in! :)
This is awesome! Love it!
You are AWESOME, lovely Mary! I really admire you for who you are – for how active you are in the community and for doing all you can to be involved. How many of our peers can say the same? You’re really an inspiration, and thanks for sharing your blog with me. I look forward to catching up on both of them, and hopefully I can open up my wordpress again and link you in. The world needs a good dose of Mary. :) Love you! -Jojo
What a great idea! Dealing with weight issues isn’t shallow, it’s important in your life. But an awesome idea to donate to local food banks – they need donations now more than ever!
@JoJo
I’m glad I told you my blog! It’s odd that I’ve kept this one to myself for so long, but I’m starting to be pretty open about it with people I actually know. I really hope you do start blogging again – I love your writing!
Comment #3… great cause & I added you to my blog today to send more your way!
GREAT idea! I agree with you that at times, it can seem shallow. But you are bettering YOURSELF and YOUR LIFE. After all, if you are healthy, think of how much more energy and time you will have to help others!
Just found your blog through Cranky fitness.
I’m 30 years old, and even now when I go home to my parents, if I leave any food on my plate, my mother will make a “face.” We grew up with not a lot of money either, and we always had to finish our plate. I rememember having to sit at the table for a few hours after supper, b/c I wouldn’t finish my stewed tomatoes. Looking back, I wish that food wasn’t considered such a big deal. I think it might have made a difference how I felt about food!
wow! what a great idea! way to support a fabulous cause :)
I respect your feelings and you have very kind heart. Nice thinking keep it up.
OK, here’s one more comment. :-) Great idea!
Give em some money!
I love what you are doing. Every single person who struggles with their weight also struggles with guilt (over zillions of uncontrollable things, not only world hunger, obv). I fully love that you are channeling your feelings into something that will contribute to the lessening of hunger in such a tangible way. I hope you are repaid tenfold in peace and gratitude.
Great plan – Glad I’m here!
I am visiting via Fat Lazy Guy. You are awesome! I am not able to match to the total money value but I will be donating all the produce I gather from my garden today to our local food bank in honor of you!
Jenna
That is a wonderful idea! Thank you!
How inspiring! Eating for the sake of producing a clean plate because of the guilt you’ve been taught to feel can lead to a lot of unhealthy food choices, not to mention weight gain. I’ve always felt that a regular cleansing regimen would help not only detox and cleanse my body, but going without solid food for a number of days helps bring back mental clarity as well, and allows a person to work through some of those guilt issues and help break some of those unhealthy associations to food in general. A great one, I’ve found (where you don’t even feel hungry, usually), is called the Master Cleanse, or the Lemonade Diet. Loads of free, useful information can be found on their main website, http://www.therawfoodsite.com. Hope this helps someone.
I’m adding another 10c here! Good for you!
Cheers to a good cause!
I hope this post will gain you some donation. Anyway, you don’t have to spend any money on weight loss, you can simply do it by yourself.
Great idea! Best of luck!
Here’s a comment!
Mo Money, Mo money, Mo Money……for the food bank……great idea, You must be a real sweetheart.
Keep up the good work!
great idea! good luck!
Commenting today!! :)
Keep up the good work!
Great idea, Mary! :) You’re an inspiration!
I’m commenting again! Great cause! Wanna come to my blog and make me work out?
Hey Mary! This is a great idea! It was a pleasure meeting you at BlogHer and I wish you best of luck in your endeavors (you have already been an inspiration!)!
Hi Mary!
I just heard about your site from @reese’s site review on twitter (because I asked her to review mine too!) and so glad I found your blog! I am currently working on trying to be healthier/lose weight, so your topic hits home.
And, what a great idea to support a good cause with comments! I had to comment… and help out a bit… Love how you say that you spend so much time trying not to eat certain things while others are starving in other countries. So true…we all need to be grateful everyday.
You just got a new subscriber. :)
Karen
You are moving in the right direction. Keep going on.
Woohooo! Thanks for all the comments guys! I think I’m definitely going to give 20 cents per comment. So lets get it to 100 comments and I’ll throw 20s at ’em!
First let me say that I think it’s wonderful that you’re giving to your food bank. As the economy worsens, I see more and more people showing up at our local food pantries. One thing you can do to help is to donate food items as well as cash. Cash sometimes goes to administrative costs, which are important, but not directly beneficial to the people who need help.
The second thing I wanted to say was that fat an affluence do not necessarily equate. There are plenty of people who get fat eating food bank food, because of the types of foods most often donated. People who live off food bank foods are often eating diets high in refined carbs. Plenty of stores donate their day old bake goods to food pantries. There’s hardly ever a shortage of breads. Generally canned goods which are donated are damaged: things the stores can’t sell because of concerns over food poisoning. I’ve even been at shelters where all the food was far past it’s expiration date.
A lot of people think that if you’re poor, you’re going to be skinny. Well, that’s not the case. Not where you can’t afford foods and end up eating breads, noodles, and rice, which are what you most often get at pantries. I once was at a pantry in Clearwater FL where all they EVER had was breads, pies, cakes and donuts. It’s all that was donated, and if you asked for milk or veggies, you were considered ungrateful. The poor are often told “be happy you have something to fill your bellies”… because nutrition often isn’t the issue for the programs/ food banks.
That being said, there are some really good programs out there, but cheap food is often not the healthiest, and even some pantries with good intentions tend to end up providing less than nutritious food for the people who go there. (another reason I recommend buying and donating food for the food banks)
and one final note: when people go to food banks it’s usually because they don’t have money to buy food, so buying foods that you have to make with other foods (macaroni and cheese that requires milk and butter for example) doesn’t work well… because they can’t get the perishables required to make the foods.
If you’re interested what a GOOD day at a GOOD pantry looks like, you can follow my visit in this post: Pantry Day
Cha-ching!! What a wonderful idea. :)
@Kate
Thanks for the comment Kate. I’ve both used and volunteered at our local food bank so I know all about how it goes. But even with all that, any help is better than none. :)