Yesterday’s post was interesting in the reactions it got. I knew a few people would disagree, think I should use other words, etc. Words like “skinny” and “fat” generally have connotations that rub some people the wrong way. Others take them for just what they are as descriptions. Everyone is different.
But I wanted to point out that my ultimate goal is NOT skinny. Not at all in any way shape or form. Promise. I wanted to acknowledge the fact that any time I lose a bit more weight and take up less space, that’s what it feels like until my mind and body adjust to the new reality of me. A big part of my journey is sharing things like that as they happen. It’s wrestling with the weird mental battle of can vs. can’t and skinny vs. fat and then sharing that internal struggle so I feel less alone.
But my goal is not to be skinny. I don’t have a goal weight of 120 even though that would be a normal healthy weight for my height. I’m not aiming to be a size zero and be ultra skinny. No. My ultimate goal is to be healthy and strong!
I wanted to just write a quick post today and this came to mind. This is my top ten list to describe my goal. I call it my Top Ten Me, basically the top ten list of things/traits/qualities I want to be.
1. HEALTHY (no longer worrying about weight, eating healthy food, being balanced)
2. STRONG (able to lift heavy weights! rawr!)
3. ACTIVE (active every day all the time without pushing myself to be)
4. DANCER (this is the farthest from true now, but it’s a secret dream I think)
5. ATHLETE (completing a triathlon has been my dream for forever)
6. TONED (not a body builder, but definitely want to be more muscle than flab)
7. ADVENTUROUS (rock climbing, sky diving, snowboarding, need I go on?)
8. VIBRANT (people who light up others, that’s what I want to be)
9. SEXY (well, we know I’m working on this one, but being sexy would be great)
10. CONFIDENT (have the confidence I’ve always lacked so I can chase my dreams)
When I consider my “goal” that’s what I consider. That’s what I’m working towards here. And nowhere on that list does it say skinny, nore will it ever. I might feel skinny when I take up less space all the sudden, but it’s not my goal and it’s something that is fleeting (we all have “fat” days). These things above are things I want to be so bad all the time. And I am working toward them each and every day. Which reminds me I need to go do some pushups and squats and … packing.
What’s the top ten YOU?
That’s a great goal to have –> just be healthy and strong. Looks like you are moving in the right direction and I’m sure you will be able to complete all of your top 10!
I have been working on a post about my goal, after a discussion I had recently with my husband. But it is a long time in the writing because it is pretty deep thinking for me and I want to get it right. But basically, after years of my yo-yo, I have finally realized that my goal has nothing to do with a number on the scale. (Or as you might say, being skinny.) My goal is to have a healthy relationship with food. To be in control of my eating instead of food controlling me. And to have that be second nature, not something I have to work at and think about all the time. I love your list and could add several of those items to mine!
You are so many of those already Mary… especially that adventurous one! :-)
I never thought about my top ten… I like my healthy & strong & muscles.. I am going to have to think about this!
Oh absolutely! I love your list of 10. I will never be skinny either and I don’t care. I do want to have my hour-glass figure back though… although of course it will never be the same as it was 15+ years ago.
Things I strive for not on your list — smart (well-read, versed in current events, well-educated), godly (I don’t want to say Christian b/c I wouldn’t want to exlude non-Christians, but caring and loving towards others, giving of myself, etc.), worldly (well-traveled with a sound understanding of (and interest in) other peoples and cultures), stylish (looking put together and classic), polite (I interrupt too frequently and sometimes speak (only at home) with food in my mouth)), and of course a Boston-qualifier.
And I would broaden my definition of healthy a lot to include things like cancer-free, etc. Health is so much more than just weight.
New reader here. ;]
Great list, Mary. Everything you’ve got up there would be on mine, as well. And I’ve always had this secret dream of being a dancer too. I think it’s got to do with the fact that my mother put me in gymnastics instead of ballet as a kid lol.
As vain as it sounds, yes, being skinny was the reason why I wanted to lose weight over the years. I hated shopping. I couldn’t stand not being able to walk up a flight of stairs without getting winded. I hated the self-loathing that came with overeating and I definitely hated not feeling attractive. And I thought, “I wouldn’t have these problems if I was skinny.” And at 23 after years of yo-yo dieting, I realized that this is about more than being skinny. This is about me dealing with my food issues and getting myself healthy. NOT seeing a specific number on the scale or pulling an ideal size off of a rack.
I just look at getting thinner as a plus, and not my main motivation for everything that I’m doing. =]
Hmmm……educated, healthy, confident, inspiring, wise, genuine, open-minded, fulfilled, aware, and, oh yeah, pregnant…I’d really like to be pregnant!
I’m sure I could keep adding words to that list, but those are the first ten that come to mind!
Great top 10 list! I don’t know if I could come up with 10 for myself, although it would probably be a good thing to do. I might have to put that on my ‘to do’ list for my own blog. My main ones would be to be healthy, fit and SKINNY! Yes I’ll use the controversial skinny word, because I do feel skinny compared to 6 months ago so I like to use that word :)
Great blog post once again Mary, I really enjoy reading your blog.
LOVE this idea. Here are my ten: strong, flexible, pulled-together, charismatic, confident, efficient, fast, toned, happy, and tough. Here’s to the women we want to be! xox.
Very nice list. Mine would be…
1. Creative
2. Faithful
3. Strong
4. Thoughtful
5. Adventurous
5. Healthy
7. Confident
8. Graceful (In my dreams)
9. Funny (Relative)
10. Super Fit
Great post! I think you are well on your way towards your goal!
I love this post, such a positive attitude and great goals! :)
Mine are:
1. Fit
2. Athletic
3. Runner (someday, someway…)
4. An Excellent Chef
5. Toned
6. Spontaneous
7. More Educated
8. Creative
9. Bendy (for Yoga)
10. World Traveller
:)
adore your list, Mary, and have to echo what Jody said about the fact you are already so many of those AND were when we first met a year ago (! damn time flies).
my list?
LOVE THIS IDEA.
Ill make mine today.
Mine would be pretty similar to yours. Confident, sexy, and toned are definitely high up there for me!
There’s a lot of stigma attached to certain words, such as “skinny” and “fat”. It’s like the word “diet”. I like that you’re taking the ominousness out of the word “skinny”.
GREAT post, Mary. You go girl! :)
I think you have a great attitude towards weight-loss, both when it’s about feeling skinny AND goals. It’s nice to see you this motivated and it motivates me too! :)
My main goal is to have fun. Then next to be strong-ish and toned-ish, which seems hard given that I’m so small and short, and to be happy.
I love this idea, and I love your list.
I’m going to have to give some good thought to this for myself – I’ve been thinking for a while now that I need to update my “motivations” and haven’t gotten around to doing it, but this post sparked that again!
it is great to read your blog!
i am so exited with my weight loss plans and now i am doing this for a long time and i can see the results.
not only that i am looking good, I’m also feel great and healthy.
its fun to read the “top ten” list and start my health program one by one.
i have also found this place for Losing Tummy Flab and this is what i am doing now.
I have been working on my goals for a while and it has been hard to put into words. I want to be super fit (able to go mountain climbing).
Another poster said stylish and that is one word I have been looking for. It is not so much I want expensive clothes, but I really want cute clothes and look put together when I go out. I am tired of blue jeans and t-shirts!
please add my mother it would mean the world to me she has been working real hard on her weight loss and blog for 24 long weeks but still has no new followers thank you everyone
oops sorry shes @ minus100-deb.blogspot.com
1. Creative
2. Inspiring
3. Sassy
4. Confident
5. A Great Cook
6. Wise
7. Beautiful in the Mirror
8. Healthy
9. A Bombshell
10.Writer
I love this post! It’s a great idea to put together a vision of where you want to be that’s beyond a number on the scale (exactly what I wrote about on my blog today). Thanks for the inspiration so I can make my own list!