Looks like quite a few of us have at one point had picky eating habits (or still do). It’s one of those things that you have to work around or grow out of when you are trying to become healthier. I really believe that you can change the majority of what you like to eat. It’s a mental process that you have to force yourself to change, and it’s hard work, but it’s possible. It is doubtful that anyone just wakes up one morning after deciding to become healthy and suddenly loves all the vegetables they previously hated. No, even your eating habits require work.
The fact that even the way you eat involves work made me start thinking about all the work required for weight loss.
Losing weight involves a lot of work.
Losing weight involves a lot of work for the long term.
You have to work to change your food. You have to learn what is healthy and good for you all the time (fruits, veggies, lean proteins, etc.) and what needs to be reserved for eating “once in a while.” You have to then make sure you stay on top of things and read food labels to count calories if that’s your method or to pay attention to things like sodium (me!) or fat. You have to come up with recipes to use that you like and make the plain foods something you delight in (because few people last with boring food). You have to buy, prepare, and cook your healthy food and have it ready so that you won’t have to rely on vending machines or fast food restaurants. If you have a full time job and a family to care for, or even if you don’t, it’s a lot of work.
And in addition to the food you have to do real work: exercise. Exercise is crucial to changing your body. If you want to lose weight efficiently exercise must be part of the equation. So you must find something you enjoy or at the very least can tolerate doing a few times each week. Or it involves things you don’t totally love (in the beginning) that grow on you. Or it involves things you hate, think are hard, but you still do anyway (hello, 30 Day Shred). Additionally you must educate yourself on exercise and how it affects your body and how to do it the right way. Or you can hire someone to teach you this as your personal trainer. Either way, you have to know what to do and then DO IT. Exercise is often something you don’t want to do, feel like you don’t have time to do, make excuses not to do, but you still have to do it anyway because it’s necessary. Weight loss requires work in the form of exercise.
So you work to change your food and you work to fit in and complete enough exercise. But the most exhaustive work is not on the outside. It’s on the inside. You have to constantly work on your mental processes when you are losing weight. If you were/are over 100 pounds overweight like I was, you most definitely have some mental things to work through. And along the weigh losing weight you will have to mentally work through plateaus, setbacks, injuries, failures, struggles when your body doesn’t do what you think it should, changing body image, and more. Most of us will admit that weight loss is mostly mental. And we would also admit that the mental games behind weight loss involve a lot of work. It’s hard work to change who you are mental. Involves a lot of mental strength and power to change yourself from being the person who didn’t care and stuffed themselves to being the person who eats healthily and exercises no matter what. Many people underestimate the mental work that change takes, but it is work and it can be exhausting.
I know it never really ends, but I feel like most of my exhausting mental work is behind me. I feel like I’m not at the point where I’ve just got the physical I-have-to-do-it kind of work left. And that’s really exciting. It’s taken me a lot of work to get to this point. It’s taken all of us a lot of work to get to whatever point we are at in our journey.
It’s all a lot of work. But it’s worth it.
Anything that’s worth having is worth the work required.
“So you work to change your food and you work to fit in and complete enough exercise. But the most exhaustive work is not on the outside. It’s on the inside. You have to constantly work on your mental processes when you are losing weight”—so totally true. But like you said, the change from the inside is probably the most amazing and profound when coupled with the other changes. It’s really about working your spirit.
Absolutely! It does become a little bit of “second nature” at some point, but it still an effort to do.
But it does take work to become overweight too. You have to go to the store to eat crap, you have to make extra food, go to the kitchen more often, put more gas in your car since you use it a lot, etc …
Of course working out is “work” in itself, but being active isn’t. You have to find a way to transform the “work” aspect of it into “play”. I’d rather go play at the gym then work out. I much rather play a soprt, then run to lose weight.
Once again, perspective. But of course it is a lot of work. Would I do it all over again? I don’t know … I’m pretty happy that the worst is behind me, but it will still be work to not fall in the old patterns again
Yeah, it definitely becomes second nature. Like in the beginning I had no idea about portion sizes and healthy foods. Now I can eyeball a good size portion without even thinking about it. Choosing good foods and balancing and all that is pretty second nature to me.
The work never ends. I think we can agree on that.
I truly think the mental aspect of weight loss is much more work and harder than the physical aspect.
Thank you so much for your post. This is so true! I can’t wait to be at the point that the mental part is behind me and that I can just focus on ‘getting it done’. Congrats on that by the way!
Mrs. O
For some it can just be about watching the numbers on the scale come down. For most there is so much more involved. My weight loss has been successful not just because I eat better and move more. Its successful because I look to fix my past to have a great future.
I can’t move forward if my past is holding me back.
No one can.
It is part of the process. Very few people are lucky enough to lose 2+ lbs week after week without any struggles or low points. For the rest of us it’s a bit harder. But you’ve done great!!
The trip was amazing. AMAZING. So much fun. :)
Hi Mary:
Love this blog. Just discovered it. So inspiring, and has a great community.
Starting a blog of my own. I look forward to continuing to follow your progress.
Alexis
Honestly it was a lot of work in the beginning but now it is second nature. I miss the gym when I can’t go and I have a hard time eating a lot of the items that were staples of my diet before. The initial effort is so worth the payoff.
well said Mary and worth also remembering that just because you lose weight or reach your goal, you then have to work to keep the weight off to maintain your body in a healthy and fit way. You can never really retire from yourself.
It IS a lot of work. A lot of planning, exercising, eating right, accountability…but’s 100% worth it.
“Anything that’s worth having is worth the work required.” <— Absolutely! Being able to bend down to tie my shoes, fit in a standard-size chair, and more freely around my life is worth all of the time and effort I have put into repairing my relationship with food (eg. uncovering the mental and emotional aspects of my disordered eating) and exercising regularly. I don't know about you, but I am not the type of person who is going to invest an assload of time into something I deem 'unworthy' — including myself. I mean, have you ever sunk a bunch of time and effort into something you didn't really care about in the first place? If you did, how long were you able to 'hack it' before you finally threw in the towel?
I learned very early that discovering my own self-worth was a huge, huge, huge reason I was able to make these changes and will hopefully enable me to sustain and maintain them for the rest of my natural life.
AMEN! It is a lot of work but it is so worth it. It makes me think of that saying that being over weight is hard, losing weight is hard, choose your hard. I choose the losing weight and keeping it off kind of hard over being over weight again!
Thanks for the thoughtful post!
Let me throw this out there: Approaching weight loss like it’s always a lot of work and something that will involve constant struggle is also a mental mind game that can undermine healthy eating and fitness. Thinking too much about it will throw a wrench in the works for sure. Once I realized this and moved on, it actually became a lot easier. Now, it’s simply a matter of habit that doesn’t take up a lot of brain power or a lot of my time. Losing and maintaining no longer became a fixation but a natural way of life.
You make a really good point. I don’t spend too much time thinking about this, but I think it needs to be said because the opposite approach – thinking it require no work and you can drop weight easily – leads a lot of people into trying unhealthy fad diets. Fixating on anything is unhealthy and you shouldn’t dwell on the fact that losing weight takes work, but you should accept and embrace it. It’s worth it to put in the work and do it the right way instead of trying 4 day diets and starving yourself.
I disagree. I think that the forces which compel many people to overeat are deeply connected to psychological aspects. Some of it is habit, but some of it is acting out on other emotional issues. Denying that there is anything deeper only increases the chance that when life becomes more complex or stressful, old pressures will reassert themselves to fall back into bad habits.
People think they have “moved on” because they have weight loss success for a time, but it turns out that they have built their “healthy” lifestyle structure over a damaged foundation. I know this because I lost a ton of weight in college and kept it off for 3 years while I had good stability in my life. Once circumstances dramatically changed and became more stressful, I put it back on and more.
I had excellent habits – no sugar, no fat, no red meat, 1.5 hours of exercise 5 days a week. I looked good, felt good, and it all came crashing down when I moved to the opposite coast, got married, and had problems with my in-laws. I never dealt with my relationship with food mentally. I just papered over it with new “better” habits. And I ended up fatter than ever. Food still controlled me, but I wrestled it into a box for awhile. Once I could no longer contain it because I didn’t have the strength due to other factors in life, it got out again and ruined my health. Now, I’m working hard toward food not controlling me. It’s a mental process as well as a lifestyle one. This time, I think it’ll stick, because I’m doing the mental work as well as the physical.
I don’t understand why people resist the idea that overeating is a psychological problem as well as a lifestyle one. The fact that it is so tough to beat strongly indicates that it has deeper roots, and the longer a person has been overweight, the deeper those roots are. If you can’t see that, then you haven’t been fat enough long enough to understand where Mary (or I) are coming from.
Great post. Love the last line. The mental aspect is always the hardest for me.
Great post! On a daily basis, I don’t think of all the work I put into trying to be healthy. It’s nice to have a reminder that I do a lot of background work. It’s even better when it all pays off :)
I love this post and I love your blog! Thank you for all the work you put into it.
I totally agree that the mental aspect is the biggest hurdle to overcome. I can’t tel you how many times I have completely sabotaged myself because I didn’t think I deserved it or I wasn’t good enough, or I would be overweight and unhappy for the rest of the life. Each day I have to remind myself that it is worth it to take the time to plan my meals, to make sure I’m getting good nutrition in and to get my exercise in each day.
I know the time/challenge is worth it because I am worth it (said in my best L’Oreal commercial voice!)
Thanks Holly! I really appreciate that.
It is worth it because you are worth it. Great line and reminder. ;)
It’s all a lot of work. But it’s worth it.
That is exactly what I was thinking as I read this!!! IT IS HARD WORK! And yes, it is life long. People don’t want to hear it but I am still working hard at it after all these many years.
So many people don’t want to do “the time” as they say…. my post tomorrow is all about this too! Our minds are on the same wavelength!
Absuloutely, it is really hard work! At other times it’s tedious, exhausting, restricting, boring and really feels like it goes against the grain, however, as someone else touched on the rewards are liberating, empowering, rejuvinating and make you feel soooo good! But sometime it’s tricky to appreciate that when you’re stuck on a piece of cardio equipment for half an hour bored out of your brain! :-)
I think your post is a lot of the reasons why I have been successful this time. I have been able to make some of the work fun. By cutting out chemicals, I can actually taste FOOD. No I did not love all veggies all at once but I like alot more of them now than I ever had before.
For exercise, I made a deal with myself. I would treat exercise like my daily vitamin, something I have to do to keep it working properly. I did not use it for “weight loss” per se. I promised myself 30 mins of movement, period, 6 days a week. I promised myself if I did not want to be a sweaty sore mess, then I would not be, walking was fine, yoga was fine, just get up and move. Lo and behold a year later, I am a sweaty ( but not particularly sore) mess at least 3 days a week because walking got boring so I started running. I have started seeking out fun active things. Not workouts just stuff I like to do. Like roller skating, water parks, kayaking, bike rides that are not intended to be workouts.
In the last year, I lost 40 lbs, I have a normal BMI for the first time in 18 years (I am 38 yrs old). So these things have worked for me.
I don’t know much about the first parts, but the mental part is so true. And you’ve done such an awesome job at it, as is apparent from your current happiness (and engagement!!). Even for those of us who are not trying to lose weight, changing ourselves on the inside, and working through things mentally is a very hard, and often slow process, but youre right that it will probably pay off in the end.
I think a lot of people steamroll past the mental parts because society rejects the idea that losing weight is any deeper mentally than “willpower” or “self-control”. Basically, we’re constantly told it is about not being so enamored of immediate gratification and discipline and told to beat ourselves up until we manage. Ultimately, this is why most people fail to lose weight and keep it off.
Most people have no experience with changing mental processes in themselves or others. They have no idea what it is like to purposefully change your responses to things and simply go about their lives with their core personality intact save slow erosion of their sharper traits due to painful experiences. How many temperamental people work hard to become less emotional? How many anxious people work hard to become less nervous or worrisome? Most people either adopt a Popeye mentality (I y’am what I y’am) and don’t change or pop pills to alter mood.
Oversimplification of the weight loss process and a punitive attitude in general toward the problem are actually sabotaging people’s ability to lose weight and maintain a healthy weight. The simpler it is made to sound, the harder it is for people to grasp and deal with the complexity. This simplification exists not to make it easier to lose weight, but to make it appear more rational to be prejudiced against fat people. In essence, if you create a mindset which asserts that it’s easy to lose weight, then you can conclude that people are failing to do something that is simple due to their sloth and gluttony.
It is a lot of work in many different ways! And while i’m working on these i am getting stronger and stronger and not just physically! Because you are right the hardest part in the mental part.
But i have to say that every little step forward is so satisfying :)
i like all off this
Great insights. You have hit the nail on the head by mentioning the work required to lose weight. It does require exercise and healthy nutrition. But you were also right to point out about the mental aspects of weight loss. I believe that exercising forces us to eat healthy. When we have invested a good deal of time in exercise, we would most likely be reluctant to put junk into our bodies. This could be due to a combination of 2 factors. One could be that we do not want to waste our efforts thus fat. The other could be that exercise has that effect on our bodies and brains. i call this the exercise threshold. This is the point where the mental pain of not exercising is more than the physical pain of exercising. The further away you are after crossing this point, the more diligent you will be with exercise and a healthy diet. And yes, it requires work. As you rightfully mentioned, anything that is worth going after is going to require effort.